Milk Milk Lemonade

Dirty children's schoolyard rhymes and jokes

 

On Top Of Old Smoky again

Posted on January 25th, 2010 by admin

On top of old Smoky
All covered with sand
I shot my true love
with a red rubber band
I shot her with care
I shot her with pride
Who could have missed her,
She was forty feet wide
I went to her funeral
I went to her grave
While the others threw flowers
I through hand grenades.
-Trent Eades, These were learned while I was in [...]

Burning of the School

Posted on January 24th, 2010 by admin

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school
We have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule
Now we’re marching down to hang the principal
Our truth goes marching on
Glory, glory, hallelujah
Teacher hit me with a ruler
I hid behind the door with a loaded 44
And the teacher don’t teach no more.
-Trent Eades, These [...]

Joy to the World

Posted on January 23rd, 2010 by admin

Sung to the tune of “Joy to the World”
Joy to the world, my teacher’s dead,
I bar-b-qued her head!
What happened to her body?
I flushed it down the potty,
and ’round and ’round it goes,
and ’round and ’round it goes,
and ‘rouu-uunnd and ‘rooounnd and ’round it goes!
Oklahoma City, circa 1989.

Mean Motherfucker

Posted on January 14th, 2010 by admin

Apparently, racism wasn’t that big of a deal back in the ’80s.
I’m a mean motherfucker, I’m a jungle man
I’m walkin through the woods with my dick in my hand
I look up in a tree, what do I see
it’s a big fat nigger tryin to piss on me
so I bust out my glock
shot him in the [...]

Broken dick

Posted on January 12th, 2010 by admin

Walkin down the halls
scratchin my balls
my dick got caught in the elevator walls
my sister screamed
my dick turned green
that was the end of my little ding a ling
I called the doctor, the doctor said
sorry son but your dick is dead
-Mike, Idaho

The cow Kicked Fred

Posted on January 9th, 2010 by admin

The cow kicked Fred in the head in the barn,
But the doctor said it would do no harm,
So we all kicked Fred in the head in the barn!
(Next verse same as the first, only a little bit louder and a little bit worse!)
-Jason
Circa Edmonton, Alberta

On top of old smokey

Posted on January 7th, 2010 by admin

On top of old smokey
all covered in blood
I shot I shot my poor teacher
with a 44 stud.
I went to her funeral
I went to her grave,
some people thew flowers
I threw hand granades.
She got up and chased
me so I cut off her head.
It rolled down the drive way
and into the street
and now all the cats
have something to [...]

Barny love

Posted on January 6th, 2010 by admin

Check out this Barny coloring book parody from FistOfBlog.com.
Tic tac toe three in a row
Barney got shot by a GI Joe
Barney called the doctor and The Doctor Said
Whoop Barneys Dead Whoop Barneys Dead.
—–
I hate you, you hate me, lets hang barney from a tree
with a shot gun bang blood is on the floor
no more purple [...]

This land is my land

Posted on December 26th, 2009 by admin

This land is my land
This land’s not your land.
I got a shot gun
and you ain’t got one
If you don’t get off
I’ll blow your head off
This land is private property.
-Zoli Nazaari-Uebele, Orange County, CA

Hi Ho

Posted on December 9th, 2009 by admin

Hi ho, hi ho
It’s off to school we go
With razor blades and hand grenades
Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho, hi ho
Hi ho, hi ho
It’s off to school we go
With dirty looks and porno books
Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho, hi ho
-A. Robbins, Oklahoma

 
 
 

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