Milk Milk Lemonade » underwear

McDonalds

admin — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 17:00:24 +0000

McDonalds is your kind of place
They serve you rattle snakes
Hamburgers up the nose
French fries between the toes
And the last time I was there
They served my underwear
McDonalds is your kind of place

-Trent Eades, These were learned while I was in grade school in Great Falls, Montana:
Circa Around fourth grade, 1972

Land of Oz

admin — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 17:00:24 +0000

In the land of oz
where the women wear no bras
and the guys don’t care
because they don’t wear underwear
-Milena, Ontario

More of Mary’s lamb

admin — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 10:21:53 +0000

Heard these on the playground in Julian California beginning in 1988. I think the Mary Little Lamb variation is from Mad Magazine

MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB

Mary had a little lamb
Which fleeece was white as snow
and everywhere that Mary went
the lamb was sure to go.

Then one day the price of meat raised
which really didn’t please her
But tonight she’s having leg of lamb
and the rest is in the freezer

ROW ROW ROW YOUR BOAT

Row, Row, Row, your boat
Gently down the stream
Push your teacher over board
And listen to her scream

Five days later floating down the Delware
Chewing on her underwear
Couldn’t afford another pair

Ten days latter bitten by a polar bear
… Poor little polar bear died

A bunch of jumprope rhymes

admin — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 05:15:16 +0000

Fudge, fudge call the judge
Mama’s gonna have a baby
Wrap it toilet paper
Send it down the escalator
What’s it gonna be?
A boy, a girl, twins or triplets?
A boy, a girl, twins or triplets?
A boy, a girl, twins or triplets?

Cin-der-ella, hair of yella
Went upstairs to kiss a fella
How many kisses did she get?
one, two, three, four, etc

Wine, wine the goose drank wine
Monkey chewed tobacco on the street car line
Line broke, monkey got choked and
We all went to heaven in a little row boat
Clap hands

Ta-rah-rah-BOOM-dee-ay
There is no school today
We made the teacher pay
We threw her in the bay
She swam to Monterey
And bought a Chevrolet
And then she drove away
Ta-rah-rah-boom-dee-ay!
Ta-rah-rah-boom-dee-ay!
They took my pants away
They left me standing there
In just my underwear
-El Rayo X, Austin, Texas

Pranks for kids

admin — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 04:58:43 +0000

Oh yeah…a cool trick to play on kids…
Q: What were you eating under there?
A: Huh? Under where?
Q: HAH-HAAAAH! You were eating underwear!!

ok one more…

Tell the kid, “When I say ‘I’m a gold lock’, you say ‘I’m a gold key’, and when I say ‘I’m a silver lock’ you say ‘I’m a silver key’, and so on. Got it?”

The kid says “Yes”.

You: “I’m a gold lock.”
Kid: “I’m a gold key.”
You: “I’m a silver lock.”
Kid: “I’m a silver key.”
You: “I’m a brass lock.”
Kid: “I’m a brass key.”
You: “I’m a mung lock.”
Kid: “I’m a monkey.”
(can be done with “Dong lock” as well)

-Matt Rosemier from Edible Dirt

Dirty Yankee Doodle

admin — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 04:49:57 +0000

Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a turtle turned the corner just in time to see a ladies girdle
-Reed, Wyoming