I hate you You hate me Let’s team up and kill Barney With a 45 and a shot right to his head We’re so glad that Barney’s dead Deck the halls with gasoline Light a match and watch it gleam Watch your school burn down to ashes Ain’t you glad you played with matches I’m [...]
Said Hamlet to Ophelia, I’ll draw a sketch of thee, What kind of pencil shall I use? 2B or not 2B? Submitted by Dermot
Warning: This contains a racial slur which was meant to infer Jed’s racist mentality and hillbilly ignorance. Well, lemme’ tell ya story ’bout a man named Jed Born a motherfucker with a rubber on his head Then one day When he was shootin’ at some “Jews” (or “spooks”) Out from the barn comes Elly May [...]
I love you, you love me You can contact my attorney ‘Cause I’m worth millions And if you want a cut You can kiss my purple butt. – Heard several years ago in Bellingham, WA, at a party, I think.
Oh let me tell you a story about a man named Jed Took Mary Ellen and threw her on the bed Zipped down his pants, out came the worm Into her cunt went the bubbly sperm There is more to this one, I think, something about granny showing a two by four or something up [...]
(sung to the tune of “Pop goes the Weasel”) Oh, John [or whomever you were insulting] doesn’t go out with girls no more He thinks he’ll never get married He stays at home and plays with himself Twink! John’s a fairy! -Trent Eades, These were learned while I was in grade school in Great Falls, [...]
On top of old Smoky All covered with sand I shot my true love with a red rubber band I shot her with care I shot her with pride Who could have missed her, She was forty feet wide I went to her funeral I went to her grave While the others threw flowers I [...]
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the school We have tortured every teacher, we have broken every rule Now we’re marching down to hang the principal Our truth goes marching on Glory, glory, hallelujah Teacher hit me with a ruler I hid behind the door with a loaded 44 And the [...]
Sung to the tune of “Joy to the World” Joy to the world, my teacher’s dead, I bar-b-qued her head! What happened to her body? I flushed it down the potty, and ’round and ’round it goes, and ’round and ’round it goes, and ‘rouu-uunnd and ‘rooounnd and ’round it goes! Oklahoma City, circa 1989.
Jack and Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter. Jill came down with two fifty. raleigh n c 1985
