Milk Milk Lemonade » masturbation

Old McDonald and his other monkey wrench

admin — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 19:20:08 +0000

Old McDonald sittin’ on a fence
Pickin’ his dick with a monkey wrench
Wrench got hot
Burnt his balls
Pissed all over his overalls
If I die
Bury me
Hang my balls on a cherry tree
If they fall
Send them back
Send them back to Radio Shack!

Shana
San Mateo, CA circa 1989

Man from Nantucket

admin — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 17:00:44 +0000

there once was a man from nantucket,
his dick was so long he could suck it,
he said with a grin while scratching his chin,
if my ear was a cunt I could fuck it.
-Zach Finch

Twink! John’s a fairy!

admin — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 17:00:53 +0000

(sung to the tune of “Pop goes the Weasel”)
Oh, John [or whomever you were insulting] doesn’t go out with girls no more
He thinks he’ll never get married
He stays at home and plays with himself
Twink! John’s a fairy!

-Trent Eades, These were learned while I was in grade school in Great Falls, Montana:
Circa This one I learned in 10th grade, around 1977