Beans, beans the musical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So let’s have beans for every meal.
Spokane, Washington back in the 70’s, Leann, Washington:
Beans, beans the musical fruit.
The more you eat, the more you toot.
The more you toot, the better you feel.
So let’s have beans for every meal.
Spokane, Washington back in the 70’s, Leann, Washington:
Ain’t yo mama pretty
She got meatballs on her titties
She got bacon and eggs between her legs
Oh, ain’t yo mama pretty
I took her to a party
She turned around and farted
I asked her why she did it
She turned around and shitted
-Katie Gentry, Green Bay, WI
Circa My mom taught me this when I was 7
Ohhhhhhh…the old grey mare she [fart sound] on the wiffle-tree
[fart sound] on the wiffle-tree, [fart sound] on the wiffle tree
The old grey mare she [fart sound] on the whiffle tree
Many long years ago.
(”Wiffle Tree” is a name for the part of the wagon that you hook the horses up to)
-Anon, Bellingham, WA
Excuse me for that burp,
it wasn’t very smart,
but if it’d come out the other end
it would have been a fart
-Milena, Ontario
Ain’t your mama pretty,
she got meatballs on her titty.
I took her to a party,
she turned around and farted.
I asked her why she did it,
she turned around and shitted.
Dan B. Wyoming – Around 1984
Down the road came pistol paul pete
20 pounds of swinging meat
down the road came mary brown
she swore no man could lay her down
pistol paul pete got her in the grass
stuck his peter up her ass
mary brown let a fart
blew his peter half apart
down the road came pistol paul pete
20 pounds of shreded meat
Submitted by Kathie
Animated version of Diarrhea.
I was drivin down the highway, Highway 84,
’til Harold let a big one and blew me out the door.
The wheels couldn’t take it,
The engine fell apart,
All because of Harold’s supersonic fart!
-Wormy, Florida
From my Grandparents on my Mom’s side…
From “Grampy” Martin:
The fly flew into the grocery store
singing doe-si-doe-si-doe
he flew right through the open door
singing doe-si-doe-si-doe
well he shit on the sugar and he shit on the ham
and he shit all over that grocery man
And then the fly flew out of the grocerey store
singing doe-si-doe-si-doe
Not to be outdone, when [...]
Jingle bells,
Batman smells,
Robin layed an egg.
The Batmobile lost a wheel,
And the Joker got away!
-B. Punzlif, Florida